Celebrate our success!

 

 

There are many things we do to self sabotage our success.  When we tend to generalize or distort our thinking patterns using the same phrases we have used for a life time-surprisingly we get the same results that we got for a lifetime.
Here are some examples of phrases that we have all used repeatedly because we didn't know better.


Extreme thinking-using the words like all or nothing.  For example "If I don't win every time there is no use in playing."   We take this kind of thinking to extremes and set ourselves up to fail. Another example of this is "-I'm not going to the beach unless I am 100% in shape."    This kind of thinking is very black and white and doesn't allow us the luxury of the grey areas.  It sets us apart using impossible standards, and it isn't the truth at least to me,  because I haven't met anyone yet who says they are 100% in shape.  The same kind of extreme thinking generates words like Always and Never."He Always says that, does that...etc.  He Never thinks before he speaks."..again extremes are rarely true there has to be a middle ground. They say there are three versions of every story-yours, mine and the truth look for the truth.  There is great freedom in the truth.   I challenge you to rethink these sentences and put them in a more positive and honest light.



Secondly -The word Should-This one was recently pointed out to me, I was doing it repeatedly  without thinking. I was using should, need to or must to motivate myself and then feeling guilty if I didn't follow through, or angry and resentful if someone else didn't follow through.  By saying should it means that I know it must get done but I am not doing it. For example I should do the laundry before I go out today.  Clearly that illustrates that I am NOT doing the laundry. So I have two choices, accept the fact that it isn't going to get done or Do it and let go of the rest of the baggage that comes with should.



The last distortion I will talk about  is not recognizing or discounting the positives.  For example the words "That doesn't count because anyone could have done it."  Why worry about others putting you down when you are doing a great job all by yourself.  The word humility means to me, that I am recognizing who and what I am and have a sincere desire to do better.  That means when someone compliments me on my new pants I should not respond with "yeah but I got them on sale" because it puts down my jeans and myself and it also  discounts the other person who chose to compliment you because you are taking what they are saying and making it less than. I choose instead to say...Thank you and let it go at that.
So the next time you find yourself using these words and phrases, stop and assess is that the truth?
And now you know better.